-What the hell happened with the broadcasts of Liverpool's pre-season tour? If the Mars Rover can beam perfect images through outer-f*****-space, presumably we can get more than a flipbook from the South Pacific.
-Martin Kelly's long-term future is at center back, every muscle and ligament in his body is screaming at us so.
-Liverpool should look into acquiring both a right and left back if the club wants to party on the continent next year.
-Brendan Rodgers didn't have his teeth bleached, he got ivory implants. And I dig'em.
-How long did it take Stew Downing to figure out his name was in one of the envelopes last year?
-Will Rodgers make a new envelope for Downing this year or just recycle the old one?
-Daniel Agger should and will be vice captain.
-I love Kolo Toure as third choice center back and I don't care who knows it.
-I hate Kolo Toure as first choice center back and I don't care who knows it.
-The best manager in Manchester now wears baby blue. Oil money has made this moment less triumphant than I had anticipated.
-Someone needs to acquire compromising photos of Brendan Rodgers and immediately deliver them to Jordan Henderson.
-What are the rules for supporting Reina/Benitez at Napoli after the Europa League Ultra violence a couple years back?
-A quick question for Evertonians, what are your thoughts on hiring a manager from a relegated club?
-Nah I'm just kidding. Martinez is great (behind a microphone) and Alcaraz and Kone are clever signings. What type of soup did they come with?
-Philippe Coutinho deserves a solid nickname. Suggestion box is open for business.
-The biggest threat to Liverpool's season: Aspas and Suarez learning Boo-Ray.
-Finally, a sincere bravo to Arsenal supporters who, over the course of the last few weeks, have taken the word "hypocritical" to breathtaking new heights*. You're not going to get Suarez, Carl Jenkinson still looks like Todd Cleary, and I look forward to Liverpool finishing above you in the table this season #WojciechSzczesny.
*(props to maninblack for the find)